There’s no easy option when you find yourself standing in the bathroom staring down at two lines. I’m pregnant, you say to yourself almost in the form of a question as the reality starts to hit you. Your mind starts racing. Your heart beats faster. Pictures flash through your head of a baby in your arms. You might feel scared, regretful, or angry. Maybe you feel happy for a split second, or maybe you feel nothing, just completely numb. Either way, finding out that you’re pregnant is overwhelming. The decisions laying before you can also be overwhelming. What should I do? What are my options?
Like many women, you don’t feel ready to parent, but you also don’t feel at ease with abortion. If this is you, adoption can be a beautiful option. We know adoption can be a scary word, and rightfully so. It’s not an easy decision, none of the options are easy. But if you have the truth about adoption, it can be an empowering and brave choice for you and your baby. In this month’s blog, we want to clear up some myths about adoption. Like we always say, we inform, you decide. It is a value of ours to provide accurate information for you as you navigate this season of your life.
Myth 1: "If I choose adoption, I’ll never see my baby again"
Generally, there are three types of adoption: open, semi-open, and closed. YOU GET TO DECIDE which type of adoption you want for you and your baby. Adoption agencies will then match you only with adoptive families who want the same type of adoption as you! Open adoption generally allows you to have direct and personal contact with your baby and the family. Semi-open usually means you have some connection to the adoptive family which could be through letters, pictures, and occasional visits. Closed adoption is when you feel it is best to have no contact with your baby or adoptive family.
Myth 3: "If I choose adoption, I can’t change my mind about a family I don’t like"
You get to hand-pick which family your baby becomes a part of! As the birth parent, you get to view several profiles including pictures, stories, and information about the prospective adoptive family. Families go through a long and extensive process to be approved for adoption. Your adoption worker will walk with you through all these decisions, but you get to be the one to say yes or no in the end.
Myth 3: "If I choose adoption, I can’t change my mind"
Many states allow the birth mom to change her mind all the way up to birth and oftentimes even days or weeks after the baby is born. You have time to make your final decision.
Myth 4: "Choosing adoption might be expensive"
There is no cost for a mom choosing adoption for her baby. Generally, all costs for adoption are paid for by the adoptive families. They pay fees to the adoption agency and lawyers who facilitate and complete the adoption.
Myth 5: "If I choose adoption my baby won’t think I love him"
Adoption is a great way to show your child you love them. It’s an extremely selfless decision that shows your baby you were thinking of them first. It is not uncommon for adopted children to reach out to their birth parents later in life to have a relationship if both are willing. Many adopted children and adults are grateful that their birth parents chose adoption.
Neither parenting, abortion, or adoption are easy choices for you, but adoption can open the door for your baby to be loved by even more people and to have a chance at a beautiful life. When you consider adoption, remember that it is a brave decision, and it’s a decision that you get to lead. At Resource Health, we are here to care for you! If you want to learn more about the truths about adoption, we will gladly connect you with a local adoption agency so you can make an empowered decision for yourself and your baby.